Tag: Spiritual Direction

WORLD MENTAL HEALTH DAY – October 10, 2023

WORLD MENTAL HEALTH DAY – October 10, 2023

Posted on by famouscapybara60

World Mental Health Day is on October 10 and as our understanding of mental health grows, we grow along with it. Mental health has come a long way since the early nineties when the World Federation of Mental Health (WFMH) officially established the day. Our self-awareness and sensitivity towards it have changed things for the better. Our language surrounding mental health has improved as words like “crazy” and “lunatic” are used less flippantly and we come to better understand that they can be unintentionally hurtful and stigmatizing. While we’ve learned a lot in this website https://miramarretreat.org/, there’s still so much more we can do to evolve as a society.

HISTORY OF WORLD MENTAL HEALTH DAY

In 1992, the World Federation of Mental Health led by the deputy secretary-general at the time, Richard Hunter, created World Mental Health Day. They didn’t have a precise objective other than to advocate for mental health as a whole. To say the least, it was an uphill climb to change a plethora of bad and dangerous habits that were making a difficult situation worse for people.

The world had a host of mental health issues that weren’t properly being treated. There were struggles to gain public funding for treatment in France, inhumane treatment in New Zealand, and an overall ignorance in regards to what mental health actually is. The WFMH knew that they needed to act on a global scale to solve a global crisis.

For the first three years, there was a two-hour telecast broadcast across the globe through the U.S. information agency satellite. The studio was located in Tallahassee, Florida and it became a useful way to get their message of advocacy out to the world. They had participation from Chile, England, Australia, and Zambia, while Geneva, Atlanta, and Mexico City pre-taped segments for the broadcast.

The first World Mental Health Day theme was  ‘Improving the Quality of Mental Health Services throughout the World’ in 1994. 27 countries sent feedback reports after the campaign and there were national campaigns in Australia and England. Continuing this momentum, WFMH board members across the globe arranged events in accordance with the day and its growing popularity among government departments, organizations, and civilians alike.

Starting in 1995 and continuing on, the Pan American Health Organization (PAHO) arranged the translation of the planning kit material into Spanish, French, Russian, Hindi, Japanese, Chinese, and Arabic. As the years passed, more countries got involved and, consequently, so did civilians as the perception of mental health became more synonymous with human rights.

The themes for World Mental Health Day expanded along with the times. Women, children, health, work, trauma, suicide, and so much more became a part of the conversation, and today, the average citizen is more knowledgeable in regards to mental health.

WORLD MENTAL HEALTH DAY - October 10, 2023

HOW TO OBSERVE WORLD MENTAL HEALTH DAY

  1. Do group therapy in the workplace

    Register for a group therapy workshop at your place of work. This can allow you and your coworkers to express themselves in a safe environment. We tend to hold onto the idea that pushing through and carrying on is the best way, but issues can arise unexpectedly if they aren’t properly dealt with.

  2. Practice self-care

    There are many changes you can make to your life that can continue beyond World Mental Health Day. Developing a regular sleep routine, adjusting your diet to healthier options, taking lunch breaks, and going on long walks are just some of the options. The point of self-care is to understand your specific needs. Find time to ask yourself what you want and go for it.

  3. Follow the theme

    Each year, there’s a new theme and even if it doesn’t directly involve your struggles, you can still learn from it. Spend some time and research the subject. Awareness extends beyond yourself and it could provide you with the proper tools to better understand others.

    5 SURPRISING FACTS ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH

    1. Unholy spirit

      It’s believed in certain cultures that mental health problems are caused by spirit possession.

    2. Global numbers

      Globally, one in four people will need mental health care in their lives.

    3. National numbers

      More than 43 million Americans battle with mental health.

    4. Youth depression

      Depression among youth has risen from 5.9% to 8.2% since 2012.

    5. Limitations

      Most Americans lack access to proper healthcare treatment.

      WHY WORLD MENTAL HEALTH DAY IS IMPORTANT

      1. Identify the problem

        The idea of the mind is an abstract concept and this day allows us to think about our thoughts. We’re evolving beyond outdated perceptions and releasing the stigma of mental health so that we can properly diagnose it and take care of ourselves. With the burden and fear removed from mental health issues, the battle becomes considerably easier.

      2. Share your pain

        This day reminds you that whatever you’re going through, you’re not alone. Too often we think that we’re the only ones facing a hard time. It’s uplifting to know that other people have gone through it and made it out to the other end. It reminds you that you can overcome your own pain.

      3. Proper treatment

        As our understanding of mental health grows, so does our ability to seek proper treatment. With the right therapist and necessary medication, you can operate on a more efficient level. The more accepting we are and the more funding that’s put into research and mental healthcare, the greater the global impact.

Dark Psychology & Manipulation: Are You Unknowingly Using Them?

Dark Psychology & Manipulation: Are You Unknowingly Using Them?

Posted on by famouscapybara60

Dark Psychology is the art and science of manipulation and mind control. While Psychology is the study of human behavior and is central to our thoughts, actions, and interactions, the term Dark Psychology is the phenomenon by which people use tactics of motivation, persuasion, manipulation, and coercion to get what they want.

While working on my doctorate and studying abnormal psychology, I came across a term called “The Dark Triad” that refers to what many criminologist and psychologist pinpoint as an easy predictor of criminal behavior, as well as problematic, broken relationships. The Dark Triad includes the traits of …

Dark Psychology & Manipulation: Are You Unknowingly Using Them?

Dark Psychology Triad

Narcissism – Egotism, grandiosity, and lack of empathy.

Machiavellianism – Uses manipulation to deceive and exploit people and has no sense of morality.

Psychopathy – Often charming and friendly yet is characterized by impulsivity, selfishness, lack of empathy, and remorselessness.

None of us want to be a victim of manipulation, but it happens quite often. We may not be subject to someone specifically in the Dark Triad, but normal, everyday people like you and I face dark psychology tactics on a daily basis.

These tactics are often found in commercials, internet ads, sales techniques, and even our manager’s behaviors. If you have kids (especially teenagers) you will most definitely experience these tactics as your children experiment with behaviors to get what they want and seek autonomy. In fact, covert manipulation and dark persuasion are often used by people you trust and love. Here https://miramarretreat.org/ are some of the tactics used most often by normal, everyday people.

Love Flooding – Compliments, affection or buttering someone up to make a request

Lying – Exaggeration, untruths, partial truths, untrue stories

Love Denial – Withhold attention and affection

Withdrawal – Avoiding the person or silent treatment

Choice restriction – Giving certain choice options that distract from the choice you don’t want someone to make

Reverse Psychology – Tell a person one thing or to do something with an intention to motivate them to do the opposite which is really what you desire.

Semantic Manipulation – Using words that are assumed to have a common or mutual definition, yet the manipulator later tells you he or she has a different definition and understanding of the conversation. Words are powerful and import.

The purpose of this article is NOT to tell you how to avoid being manipulated and exploited (I’ll write about this in my next post). Rather, it’s to remind us all of how easy it is to fall into using these tactics in order to get what we want. I want to challenge you to assess your tactics in all areas of life, including your work, leadership, romantic relationships, parenting, and friendships.

While some people who use theses dark tactics know exactly what they are doing and they are intentional about manipulating you to getting what they want, others use dark and unethical tactics without being fully aware of it. Many of these people learned the tactics during childhood from their parents. Others learned the tactics in their teenage years or adulthood by happenstance. They used a manipulation tactic unintentionally and it worked. They got what they wanted. Therefore, they continue to use tactics that help them get their way.

In some cases, people are trained to use these tactics. Training programs that teach dark, unethical psychological and persuasion tactics are typically sales or marketing programs. Many of these programs use dark tactics to create a brand or sell a product with the sole purpose of serving themselves or their company, not the customer. Many of these training programs convince people that using such tactics are okay and is for the benefit of the buyer. Because, of course, their lives will be much better when they purchase the product or service.

Who uses Dark Psychology and manipulation tactics? Here’s a list of people who seem to use these tactics the most.

Narcissists – People who are truly narcissistic (meeting clinical diagnosis) have an inflated sense of self-worth. They need others to validate their belief of being superior. They have dreams of being worshipped and adored. They use dark psychology tactics, manipulation, and unethical persuasion to maintain.

Sociopaths – People who are truly sociopathic (meeting clinical diagnosis), are often charming, intelligent, yet impulsive. Due to a lack of emotionality and ability to feel remorse they use dark tactics to build a superficial relationship and then take advantage of people.

Attorneys – Some attorneys focus so intently on winning their case that they resort to using dark persuasion tactics to get the outcome they want.

Politicians – Some politicians use dark psychological tactics and dark persuasion tactics to convince people they are right and to get votes.

Sales People – Many salespeople become so focused on achieving a sale that they use dark tactics to motivate and persuade someone to buy their product.

Leaders – Some leaders use dark tactics to get compliance, greater effort, or higher performance from their subordinates.

Public Speakers – Some speakers use dark tactics to heighten the emotional state of the audience knowing it leads to selling more products at the back of the room.

Selfish People – This can be anyone who has an agenda of self before others. They will use tactics to meet their own needs first, even at someone else’s expense. They don’t mind win-lose outcomes.

Yes, I know. I probably stepped on some toes. As a speaker and a person who is involved in selling services, I fall into this category as well. This is why I must remind myself that working, writing, speaking, and selling with character requires that I avoid manipulative and coercive tactics.

When I’m facilitating training programs on motivation to business leaders, I am often asked about where the line resides between dark psychological tactics and ethical influence and persuasion tactics? Some of these people fully admit that they use these practices often or that their organizations require them to use dark practices as a part of the company’s processes to get and maintain customers.

This is truly unfortunate, and although leading to short-term sales and revenue, will ultimately lead to distrust, poor business practices, poor employee loyalty, and over the long-term less successful business outcomes.

To differentiate between those motivation and persuasion tactics that are dark and those that are ethical, it’s important to assess your intent. We must ask ourselves if the tactics that we are using have an intention to help the other person? It is okay for the intention to be to help you as well, but if it’s solely for your benefit, you can easily fall into dark and unethical practices.

Having a mutually beneficial or a “win-win” outcome should be the goal. However, you must be honest with yourself and your belief that the other person will truly benefit. An example of this is a salesperson who believes everyone will benefit from his product and life will be much better for the customer because of the purchase. A salesperson with this mentality can easily fall into using dark tactics to move the person to buy and use an “ends justifies the means” mentality. This opens the person up to any and all tactics to get the sale.

We can ask ourselves the following questions to assess our intention along with our motivation and persuasion tactics:

  1. What is my goal for this interaction? Who benefits and how?
  2. Do I feel good about how I am approaching the interaction?
  3. Am I being totally open and honest?
  4. Will the result of this interaction lead to a long-term benefit for the other person?
  5. Will the tactics I use lead to a more trusting relationship with the other person?

Do you want to be truly successful in your leadership, relationships, parenting, work, and other areas of life? Then assess yourself to determine your current tactics for motivation and persuasion. Doing it right leads to long-term credibility and influence. Doing it wrong (going dark) leads to poor character, broken relationships, and long-term failure because people eventually see through the darkness and realize your intent.

In my next post I will review the different types of dark psychology and manipulation tactics used most commonly. This will help you be aware of them and avoid being manipulated. Here are some of the tactics I will review…

  • Love Flooding
  • Love Denial
  • Coercive Reinforcement
  • Fatigue Inducement
  • Subliminal Influence
  • Choice Restriction
  • Reverse Psychology
  • Mind Games
  • Brainwashing
  • And a few more tactics you’ll want to know about.
What Is Spirituality?

What Is Spirituality?

Posted on by famouscapybara60

Spirituality is a broad concept with room for many perspectives. In general, it includes a sense of connection to something bigger than ourselves, and it typically involves a search for meaning in life. As such, it is a universal human experience—something that touches us all. People may describe a spiritual experience as sacred or transcendent or simply a deep sense of aliveness and interconnectedness.

Some may find that their spiritual life is intricately linked to their association with a church, temple, mosque, or synagogue. Others may pray or find comfort in a personal relationship with God or a higher power. Still others seek meaning through their connections to nature or art. Like your sense of purpose, your personal definition of spirituality may change throughout your life, adapting to your own experiences and relationships. Learn more about sprituality in this website https://miramarretreat.org/

Spiritual questions

Explore life purposeFor many, spirituality is connected to large questions about life and identity, such as:

  1. Am I a good person?
  2. What is the meaning of my suffering?
  3. What is my connection to the world around me?
  4. Do things happen for a reason?
  5. How can I live my life in the best way possible?

What Is Spirituality?

Experts’ definitions of spirituality

    • Christina Puchalski, MD, Director of the George Washington Institute for Spirituality and Health, contends that “spirituality is the aspect of humanity that refers to the way individuals seek and express meaning and purpose and the way they experience their connectedness to the moment, to self, to others, to nature, and to the significant or sacred.”
    • According to Mario Beauregard and Denyse O’Leary, researchers and authors of The Spiritual Brain, “spirituality means any experience that is thought to bring the experiencer into contact with the divine (in other words, not just any experience that feels meaningful).”
  • Nurses Ruth Beckmann Murray and Judith Proctor Zenter write that “the spiritual dimension tries to be in harmony with the universe, and strives for answers about the infinite, and comes into focus when the person faces emotional stress, physical illness, or death.”

Relationship between religion and spirituality

While spirituality may incorporate elements of religion, it is generally a broader concept. Religion and spirituality are not the same thing, nor are they entirely distinct from one another. The best way to understand this is to think of two overlapping circles like this:

  • In spirituality, the questions are: where do I personally find meaning, connection, and value?
  • In religion, the questions are: what is true and right?

Where the circles overlap is the individual experience, which affects the way you think, feel, and behave.

Spirituality versus emotional health

You will notice as you read on that many practices recommended for cultivating spirituality are similar to those recommended for improving emotional wellbeing. This is because there is a connection between the two—emotional and spiritual wellbeing influence one another and overlap, as do all aspects of wellbeing.

  1. Spirituality is about seeking a meaningful connection with something bigger than yourself, which can result in positive emotions, such as peace, awe, contentment, gratitude, and acceptance.
  2. Emotional health is about cultivating a positive state of mind, which can broaden your outlook to recognize and incorporate a connection to something larger than yourself.

Thus, emotions and spirituality are distinct but linked, deeply integrated with one another.

“You do not need to know precisely what is happening, or exactly where it is all going. What you need is to recognize the possibilities and challenges offered by the present moment, and to embrace them with courage, faith and hope.”

Thomas Merton
Adult ADHD and Burnout

Adult ADHD and Burnout

Posted on by famouscapybara60

When you have ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) you may feel like a juggler. You may be pretty good at keeping two or three balls in the air. But when the world tosses a few more at you, they can all fall to the floor.

Trying to keep up with work, school, and other responsibilities overwhelms you and can cause burnout – especially if your ADHD isn’t treated.

Burnout can affect your home, work, and social life, says David Goodman, MD, assistant professor, Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at Johns Hopkins School of Medicine in Baltimore, director of the Adult Attention Deficit Disorder Center of Maryland, and an expert with CHADD (Children and Adults with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder).

Goodman describes burnout this way:

  • You no longer take interest or pleasure in your normal activities.
  • You see allies (like co-workers) as enemies who are burdening you with more and more work.
  • You withdraw because you believe it’s impossible to get things done.

Adult ADHD and Burnout

The symptoms of ADHD – like not being organized, trouble paying attention, and poor time management – add to burnout.

ADHD burnout is a specific kind of burnout, says Amber Meeks, who has ADHD and is a mental health advocate from Murfreesboro, TN. Part of the problem is that “people with ADHD work harder to do the things most people do with little effort.”

Imagine yourself on an interactive exercise bicycle, Goodman says. You pedal faster and faster to try to keep up with others, your heart rate hits its peak and you can’t pedal any harder. But, even your best isn’t good enough and you fall behind the standard of others.

Certain life changes can ignite burnout – especially if you’re untreated, Goodman says. In college, for example, “academic demands are increasing but so are social distractions. Plus your time management skills are already poor.”

Other problems specific to people with ADHD also add fuel to burnout.

“ADHDers experience something called ‘hyperfocus,’ periods of time in which we are transfixed and fully focused on a subject or project. These periods can last from hours to days and we often neglect taking care of ourselves when we are hyperfocused. We don’t eat right, sleep well, etc. This often leads us to burnout more quickly,” Meeks says.

Look this https://miramarretreat.org/‘s article for these ADHD burnout symptoms:

Lack of motivation. “If you like working out 5 days a week, you’re probably not going to be doing that. Or, if you enjoy playing with your kids you’ll do less of that,” Goodman says.

Exhaustion. “You feel tired all the time no matter how much rest you get,” Meeks says.

Poor Performance. You may not be able to focus on the work at hand. “It may feel impossible to do anything, even when it’s really important,” Meeks says.

Pain.Stress also can trigger things like stomachaches and headaches.

Irritability. You snap at people. You yell at the kids because they spilled milk on the floor. Or you get mad at your spouse because they forgot something at the grocery store.

Troubled Emotions. You withdraw or can’t smile at people, Goodman says. “I tend to get weepy and sad when I’m burned out,” Meeks says.

Negativity or Pessimism. It can feel almost impossible to be positive about anything, Meeks says. This is especially true in the areas that are causing your burnout – whether it’s school, work, or home life.

When your kids, co-workers, or clients start looking like the enemy, that’s a concrete sign that you are burned out, Goodman stresses.

He adds that at least 70% of adults with ADHD have another mental health problem like anxiety or depression. These problems interfere with your ability to cope and fight burnout.

If you have a medical condition too, it can make you sicker. Perhaps you have diabetes. Your burnout and stress can affect your ability to control your blood sugar.

“So you can see how this is a spiral downward,” Goodman says.

The first step is recognizing and accepting that you are burned out. “If your friends and loved ones say you aren’t doing well, don’t take it as a criticism,” Goodman says. Educate yourself about burnout and then get some help from a mental health professional.

Here’s what else you can do:

Know your limits. Some people think they can pile it all on their plate and carry it even though it’s dripping off the plate, Goodman says. You need to face the fact that your expectations sometimes go beyond what you can actually do. This is where therapy can help you see that you need to balance expectations with reality.

Learn to prioritize. “You won’t be able to juggle 12 balls at once,” Goodman says. You need to pick six that you can juggle well and the other six need to be put to the side until you have more time for them. Setting priorities is difficult for people with ADHD. “It’s either I need to do it now or if it’s not due yesterday it doesn’t need to be done until tomorrow. The problem is something comes up tomorrow that’s urgent and that’s how things mount up.”

Just say “no.” People with ADHD often are people pleasers, have a hard time saying no, and overcommit themselves, Meeks says. “Practice saying no and not feeling guilty about it. The people in our lives should be understanding of the need to keep ourselves safe and healthy,” she adds.

Get some rest. Don’t feel guilty about taking a breather. People with ADHD spend their whole lives being told that they aren’t trying hard enough. As a result, they often push themselves as hard as possible, Meeks says. “Resting feels ‘lazy,’ a word that has been used against us like a weapon for most of our lives.”

If it’s broken, fix it. If your ADHD symptoms seem out of control, talk to your doctor. You may need to add or change medication or learn better organization and time-management skills. This can help you get through your days with fewer stumbling blocks and more confidence.

Meeks says: “Make sure that you ask for help when you need it, whether that be by asking someone to help you with chores or going to therapy. Be kind to yourself. Give yourself the same grace you would give a loved one who was in the same situation.”

Depression (major depressive disorder) – Symptoms and causes

Depression (major depressive disorder) – Symptoms and causes

Posted on by famouscapybara60

Depression is a mood disorder that causes a persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest. Also called major depressive disorder or clinical depression, it affects how you feel, think and behave and can lead to a variety of emotional and physical problems. You may have trouble doing normal day-to-day activities, and sometimes you may feel as if life isn’t worth living.

More than just a bout of the blues, depression isn’t a weakness and you can’t simply “snap out” of it. Depression may require long-term treatment. But don’t get discouraged. Most people with depression feel better with medication, psychotherapy or both. To know further information about it keep reading in this website https://miramarretreat.org/

Symptoms

Although depression may occur only once during your life, people typically have multiple episodes. During these episodes, symptoms occur most of the day, nearly every day and may include:

  • Feelings of sadness, tearfulness, emptiness or hopelessness
  • Angry outbursts, irritability or frustration, even over small matters
  • Loss of interest or pleasure in most or all normal activities, such as sex, hobbies or sports
  • Sleep disturbances, including insomnia or sleeping too much
  • Tiredness and lack of energy, so even small tasks take extra effort
  • Reduced appetite and weight loss or increased cravings for food and weight gain
  • Anxiety, agitation or restlessness
  • Slowed thinking, speaking or body movements
  • Feelings of worthlessness or guilt, fixating on past failures or self-blame
  • Trouble thinking, concentrating, making decisions and remembering things
  • Frequent or recurrent thoughts of death, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempts or suicide
  • Unexplained physical problems, such as back pain or headaches

For many people with depression, symptoms usually are severe enough to cause noticeable problems in day-to-day activities, such as work, school, social activities or relationships with others. Some people may feel generally miserable or unhappy without really knowing why.

Depression (major depressive disorder) - Symptoms and causes

Depression symptoms in children and teens

Common signs and symptoms of depression in children and teenagers are similar to those of adults, but there can be some differences.

  • In younger children, symptoms of depression may include sadness, irritability, clinginess, worry, aches and pains, refusing to go to school, or being underweight.
  • In teens, symptoms may include sadness, irritability, feeling negative and worthless, anger, poor performance or poor attendance at school, feeling misunderstood and extremely sensitive, using recreational drugs or alcohol, eating or sleeping too much, self-harm, loss of interest in normal activities, and avoidance of social interaction.

Depression symptoms in older adults

Depression is not a normal part of growing older, and it should never be taken lightly. Unfortunately, depression often goes undiagnosed and untreated in older adults, and they may feel reluctant to seek help. Symptoms of depression may be different or less obvious in older adults, such as:

  • Memory difficulties or personality changes
  • Physical aches or pain
  • Fatigue, loss of appetite, sleep problems or loss of interest in sex — not caused by a medical condition or medication
  • Often wanting to stay at home, rather than going out to socialize or doing new things
  • Suicidal thinking or feelings, especially in older men

When to see a doctor

If you feel depressed, make an appointment to see your doctor or mental health professional as soon as you can. If you’re reluctant to seek treatment, talk to a friend or loved one, any health care professional, a faith leader, or someone else you trust.

When to get emergency help

If you think you may hurt yourself or attempt suicide, call 911 in the U.S. or your local emergency number immediately.

Also consider these options if you’re having suicidal thoughts:

  • Call your doctor or mental health professional.
  • Contact a suicide hotline.
    • In the U.S., call or text 988 to reach the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Or use the Lifeline Chat. Services are free and confidential.
    • U.S. veterans or service members who are in crisis can call 988 and then press “1” for the Veterans Crisis Line. Or text 838255. Or chat online.
    • The Suicide & Crisis Lifeline in the U.S. has a Spanish language phone line at 1-888-628-9454 (toll-free).
  • Reach out to a close friend or loved one.
  • Contact a minister, spiritual leader or someone else in your faith community.

If you have a loved one who is in danger of suicide or has made a suicide attempt, make sure someone stays with that person. Call 911 or your local emergency number immediately. Or, if you think you can do so safely, take the person to the nearest hospital emergency room.

Causes

It’s not known exactly what causes depression. As with many mental disorders, a variety of factors may be involved, such as:

  • Biological differences. People with depression appear to have physical changes in their brains. The significance of these changes is still uncertain, but may eventually help pinpoint causes.
  • Brain chemistry. Neurotransmitters are naturally occurring brain chemicals that likely play a role in depression. Recent research indicates that changes in the function and effect of these neurotransmitters and how they interact with neurocircuits involved in maintaining mood stability may play a significant role in depression and its treatment.
  • Hormones. Changes in the body’s balance of hormones may be involved in causing or triggering depression. Hormone changes can result with pregnancy and during the weeks or months after delivery (postpartum) and from thyroid problems, menopause or a number of other conditions.
  • Inherited traits. Depression is more common in people whose blood relatives also have this condition. Researchers are trying to find genes that may be involved in causing depression.

Risk factors

Depression often begins in the teens, 20s or 30s, but it can happen at any age. More women than men are diagnosed with depression, but this may be due in part because women are more likely to seek treatment.

Factors that seem to increase the risk of developing or triggering depression include:

  • Certain personality traits, such as low self-esteem and being too dependent, self-critical or pessimistic
  • Traumatic or stressful events, such as physical or sexual abuse, the death or loss of a loved one, a difficult relationship, or financial problems
  • Blood relatives with a history of depression, bipolar disorder, alcoholism or suicide
  • Being lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender, or having variations in the development of genital organs that aren’t clearly male or female (intersex) in an unsupportive situation
  • History of other mental health disorders, such as anxiety disorder, eating disorders or post-traumatic stress disorder
  • Abuse of alcohol or recreational drugs
  • Serious or chronic illness, including cancer, stroke, chronic pain or heart disease
  • Certain medications, such as some high blood pressure medications or sleeping pills (talk to your doctor before stopping any medication)

Complications

Depression is a serious disorder that can take a terrible toll on you and your family. Depression often gets worse if it isn’t treated, resulting in emotional, behavioral and health problems that affect every area of your life.

Examples of complications associated with depression include:

  • Excess weight or obesity, which can lead to heart disease and diabetes
  • Pain or physical illness
  • Alcohol or drug misuse
  • Anxiety, panic disorder or social phobia
  • Family conflicts, relationship difficulties, and work or school problems
  • Social isolation
  • Suicidal feelings, suicide attempts or suicide
  • Self-mutilation, such as cutting
  • Premature death from medical conditions

Prevention

There’s no sure way to prevent depression. However, these strategies may help.

  • Take steps to control stress, to increase your resilience and boost your self-esteem.
  • Reach out to family and friends, especially in times of crisis, to help you weather rough spells.
  • Get treatment at the earliest sign of a problem to help prevent depression from worsening.
  • Consider getting long-term maintenance treatment to help prevent a relapse of symptoms.
The 7 Stages of Spiritual Development

The 7 Stages of Spiritual Development

Posted on by famouscapybara60

You are a spiritual being and have the potential to fully embrace your spirituality. However, like everything in life, embarking on your spiritual path is a choice. In life you are presented with several choices leading to new stages of development. Initially, most progress along the same path but, at certain points, you have choices—whether to stay immersed in the status quo world or to explore the splendors of your spiritual journey. These choices can appear at any time during your life; the key is to stay alert and listen to the wisdom of your heart. Keep reading in this website https://miramarretreat.org/ to know all the information about it.

Stage 1: Innocence

You are born into a material world, where your life is dominated by your lower three chakras. You enter the world in a state of innocence and as long as you are healthy and have a loving family, you live in a world of joy and bliss. You still have a strong connection to the Divine and the field of the Absolute from which your consciousness just emerged. The spiritual being is still very much awake. However, for most this memory begins to fade as you are taught how to “fit in” and you become distracted by the world around you. A rare few manage to maintain their Divine connection and enjoy spiritual greatness.

Stage 2: Fear, Ego

As you grow, the ego emerges and soon you realize that you are completely at the mercy of all around you. The pure love you have experienced up until now begins to be overshadowed by fear and its corresponding emotions. You find that to get what you want, you have to please those in charge. You develop your personality and begin creating all the stories that will shape and define your life.

Stage 3: Power

In your desire to overcome fear, you create success in your life. You become educated, start your careers and family. You want to have control to eliminate fear. You accumulate things to give you a sense of security.

The 7 Stages of Spiritual Development

First Choice

For many people, further growth and spiritual development ends here. You choose to continue to be consumed with material desires, you seek more and more power and control. Your life becomes self-centered and you remain at Stage 3.

For others, a feeling that there is more to life begins to dawn. Rather than just accumulating possessions and power, you look for a deeper meaning to life. You start to awaken spiritually and continue to Stage 4.

Stage 4: Giving

In this stage, you begin to realize that there is more to life than personal power and material gain. You ask yourself how you can help others, how can you serve the world around you. You become comfortable with giving as well as receiving.

However, giving can also create a sense of power. At this stage, giving can often still be ego driven. You give because you expect some form of recognition or because it makes you feel good about yourself.

Second Choice

You can continue to give from the level of ego, always expecting something in return for your giving. This obviously can have a lot of merit, and you can do many good things in the world. However, it leaves a constriction to your full spiritual growth.

The opportunity of your second choice is when you begin to give from the level of love and compassion without any concern for recognition or reward. Your giving becomes selfless and your true spiritual journey begins.

Stage 5: The Seeker

Now you begin your regular spiritual practices. The longing for Enlightenment grows within you. Your decisions now come mostly from the fourth chakra, the heart center.

You begin to look for the deeper meaning of things. You try to understand why you are here and how you can make your life more meaningful. You may study with teachers and gurus. You read books and practice techniques. You have glimpses of the goal that encourages you to remain on the path.

The throat chakra opens as you express the qualities of the heart in your life.

Stage 6: The Sage

Cosmic Consciousness dawns. Your mind fully awakens. You become the witness of your actions and realize that you are the role player in the multitude of roles you play. The fear of death dissolves as you realize that life is just another role. Simple yogic powers become available to us. However, there is still a separation between the giver and the recipient.

Third Choice

You have now reached another critical junction point in your journey. Your mind is fully awake but some ego is still present. The choice or mistake here is to believe that you are something special. You mistakenly think you have reached the goal and may promote yourself as such. The end is in sight but you have allowed the ego to hide it from view and you remain stuck in a false sense of spiritual attainment.

The alternative choice is to recognize the ego but not succumb to it, to allow it to find its place harmoniously within the whole. You continue your journey with humility and devotion. Giving is done purely for the sake of giving. “What’s in it for me” becomes “How can I serve?”

Insight and spiritual inspiration begin to grow, you hear the voice of the inner guru as the sixth chakra opens.

Stage 7: Spirit

Your heart now fully awakens. You experience Divine and Unity Consciousness.

There is no longer any separation. No giver, given, or giving. No sense of “I” or “me,” just an awareness of Oneness. You still live “in the world,” but are no longer “of the world.”

Your spiritual practice is Pure Joy. All the chakras are open, spiritual energy flows freely.

Choicelessness

When you reach the seventh stage there are no longer choices. You function totally in harmony with nature. Everything is provided exactly as needed, at exactly the right moment. You are the Totality.

As you progress though these stages, the material world seems very attractive at first while the spiritual might seem empty and hard but, if followed, it eventually leads to the experience of the True Self and eternal bliss.

There is nothing lacking in the life of a great yogi. He or she doesn’t feel that anything has been given up. In fact, it’s the reverse—great yogis feel that by not following a spiritual path, eternal bliss has been renounced for the sake of a few passing moments of happiness. The material world is like a dry garden waiting for knowledge of the Divine to make it bloom. In the material world you only have the energy of the body, on the spiritual path you tap into Divine Consciousness, Cosmic Energy. The material world is a prison, the spiritual path leads to unbounded freedom.

You are always at a junction in your path, Truth or illusion, material or eternal. The ego will constantly try to keep its limiting hold on you. Choose wisely. Everything you do is a spiritual act if you do it with awareness. Find your path and inner peace.

Be regular and disciplined with your spiritual practice. Don’t be disheartened if you wander off. Ultimately your spiritual journey becomes your way of life, like a lush oasis in the desert of mundane living.

What Does the Term ‘Emotionally Unstable’ Mean?

What Does the Term ‘Emotionally Unstable’ Mean?

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What Does the Term ‘Emotionally Unstable’ Mean?

Emotional instability is a catch-all term sometimes used to refer to unpredictable reactions and extreme emotions. While it is natural for everyone to experience a range of emotions, the term is usually used when discussing people who have more difficulty regulating their emotions.

It is not an official diagnosis, but it is common to hear its use when discussing emotionally unstable personality disorder (EUPD) or, as it’s more commonly known, borderline personality disorder (BPD).

That said, difficulty in regulating emotions can also occur within other mental illnesses like anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, and schizophrenia.

What Is Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder (EUPD)?

As mentioned above, EUPD is another name used to describe BPD — a personality disorder characterized by unstable moods and emotions, relationships, and behavior.

BPD, if left untreated, can severely impact a person’s life behavior, self-image and stress-related thinking. Thus, it is commonly associated with issues like relationship, work, and school problems.

Why This Terminology Is Problematic

The term EUPD is seldom used these days due to the negative connotations it denotes. For example, a recent 2021 observational study found the term EUPD causes stigma to patients, thus further limiting their access to mental health services. They also found that it lacks the nuance to accurately reflect the true nature and gravity of the illness.

In some cases, the term “emotional intensity disorder” (EID) is also used in its place. However, this term is less commonly used as its deemed quite controversial too.

All these terms are often used interchangeably (and some more than others due to personal preference). But, BPD is by far the most common one — though it is also seen to be outdated.

What Does the Term ‘Emotionally Unstable’ Mean?

Signs & Symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder

People with BPD don’t all experience the same symptoms, and the condition can look different for everyone. In addition, the frequency, duration, and severity of these symptoms also change depending on a person and their history. However, there is ample research in this website https://miramarretreat.org/ based on the topic; therefore, there are many common signs that help clinicians diagnose someone with it.

Some common signs and symptoms of BPD include:

  • A pattern of unstable and intense relationships with loved ones, family, friends, and work colleagues
  • A disordered sense of self and self-image
  • Repeated efforts to avoid real or perceived abandonment
  • Impulsive and risky behaviors, such as risky sex, substance abuse, uncontrolled financial spending, reckless driving, and binge eating
  • Self-harming behaviors like cutting
  • Suicidal ideation — recurring thoughts of suicidal threats and behaviors
  • Feelings of chronic emptiness that don’t go away easily
  • Issues regulating anger or aggressive outbursts
  • Dissociation (i.e., feeling as if you’re cut off from yourself, your feelings, or reality)
  • Very intense moods that can quickly change

Is It Appropriate to Use the Term “Emotionally Unstable?”

While the term is sometimes used in a clinical setting, it is inappropriate to use. The statement brings forth negative connotations; therefore, it is highly offensive and stigmatizing. For example, a 2007 study found that stigma against mental illness contributes to the hesitancy of young people seeking help for their mental illnesses.

“Emotionally unstable” is an impolite and triggering term; therefore, it is highly advised that people remove it from their vocabulary.

What to Say Instead

Well, it is important to interrogate what it is you are actually trying to say and be specific. For example, instead of naming the situation, perhaps it may be best to think of ways to defuse the emotions being expressed. Ask the individual how you can help make them feel safe or perhaps, help them seek medical care.

Other than this, the most agreed-upon term used when discussing issues with managing, expressing, and coping with emotions is “emotion regulation.” While it is broad, it does not carry the same stigma and harshness.

How Is Borderline Personality Disorder Treated?

At one point in time, many experts believed that BPD was treatment-resistant. However, current research shows that BPD is very treatable with the right mental health professional.7 As a result, there are many people with BPD who are leading fulfilling lives.

Some of the most common treatment options include:

Psychotherapy

Psychotherapy is the most typical treatment option for those with BPD. There are a few different types that are seen as effective in treating BPD; these are:

  • Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT): This is a modified type of cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT). It was formed as a response to the belief that the problems of BPD come from individuals with high emotional sensitivity and invalidating environments. Therefore, DBT teaches people to recognize and become aware of their beliefs and behaviors. It teaches individuals how to live in the moment, improve their relationships, and develop healthy coping mechanisms. It can also teach people more balanced responses to the behaviors of others.
  • Mentalization-Based Treatment (MBT): The term “mentalizing” refers to the ability of someone to recognize their mental state and other people’s emotions to better understand interpersonal interactions. Therefore, this is a type of therapy that focuses on helping people with their ability to recognize their thoughts, wishes, feelings and desires. It does this by seeing how they are linked to behavior. MBT proposes that BPD symptoms occur when individuals stop mentalizing. So, it aims to help people improve their understanding of themselves and others.

Medication

Medication is often recommended by a medical professional to treat BPD. The medication doesn’t cure it, but it does offer some relief from some symptoms. It is also often used in conjunction with psychotherapy for better symptom relief.

Some medications commonly prescribed include antidepressants, antipsychotics, and antianxiety medication.

Other Treatment Options

In times of crisis, hospitalizations or more intensive treatments can sometimes be recommended. While this is a stigmatized option, it is important not to feel any shame in receiving this treatment option. You are more than deserving of getting help that you need.

A Word From Verywell

While emotional instability is a very real and difficult thing to deal with, using the term “emotionally unstable” is not advisable. While you may mean well, it is important to remember that for some it may be a very sensitive and triggering term. Therefore, to be safe it is best to use another term, or offer more practical advice, such as self-care and mindfulness.

Reduce Stress in 10 Minutes and Improve Your Well-Being

Reduce Stress in 10 Minutes and Improve Your Well-Being

Posted on by famouscapybara60

What is the fastest way to relieve stress?

There are countless techniques for managing stress. Yoga, mindfulness meditation, and exercise are just a few examples of stress-relieving activities that work wonders. But in the heat of the moment, during a high-pressured job interview, for example, or a disagreement with your spouse, you can’t just excuse yourself to meditate or take a long walk. In these situations, you need something more immediate and accessible.

One of the speediest and most reliable ways to stamp out stress is to engage one or more of your senses—sight, sound, taste, smell, touch—or through movement. Since everyone is different, you’ll need to do some experimenting to discover which technique works best for you—but the payoff is huge. You can stay calm, productive, and focused when you know how to quickly relieve stress.

Social interaction is your body’s most evolved and surefire strategy for regulating the nervous system. Talking face-to-face with a relaxed and caring listener can help you quickly calm down and release tension. Although you can’t always have a pal to lean on in the middle of a stressful situation, maintaining a network of close relationships is vital for your mental health. Between sensory-based stress relief and good listeners, you’ll have your bases covered. Keep reading https://miramarretreat.org/ to know all the tips.

Reduce Stress in 10 Minutes and Improve Your Well-Being

Tip 1: Recognize when you’re stressed

It might seem obvious that you’d know when you’re stressed, but many of us spend so much time in a frazzled state that we’ve forgotten what it feels like when our nervous systems are in balance: when we’re calm yet still alert and focused. If this is you, you can recognize when you’re stressed by listening to your body. When you’re tired, your eyes feel heavy and you might rest your head on your hand. When you’re happy, you laugh easily. And when you’re stressed, your body lets you know that, too. Get in the habit of paying attention to your body’s clues.

Observe your muscles and insides. Are your muscles tense or sore? Is your stomach tight, cramped, or aching? Are your hands or jaw clenched?

Observe your breath. Is your breathing shallow? Place one hand on your belly, the other on your chest. Watch your hands rise and fall with each breath. Notice when you breathe fully or when you “forget” to breathe.

Tip 2: Identify your stress response

Internally, we all respond the same way to the “fight-or-flight” stress response: your blood pressure rises, your heart pumps faster, and your muscles constrict. Your body works hard and drains your immune system. Externally, however, people respond to stress in different ways.

The best way to quickly relieve stress often relates to your specific stress response:

Overexcited stress response: If you tend to become angry, agitated, overly emotional, or keyed up under stress, you will respond best to stress relief activities that quiet you down.

Underexcited stress response: If you tend to become depressed, withdrawn, or spaced out under stress, you will respond best to stress relief activities that are stimulating and energizing.

The immobilization or “frozen” stress response

Do you freeze when under stress? The immobilization stress response is often associated with a past history of trauma. When faced with stressful situations, you may find yourself totally stuck and unable to take action. Your challenge is to break free of your “frozen” state by rebooting your nervous system and reactivating the body’s natural “fight-or-flight” stress response. Physical movement that engages both your arms and legs, such as walking, swimming, running, dancing, climbing, or tai chi, can be particularly helpful. As you move, focus on your body and the sensations you feel in your limbs rather than on your thoughts. This mindfulness element can help your nervous system become “unstuck” and move on.

Tip 3: Bring your senses to the rescue

To use your senses to quickly relieve stress, you first need to identify the sensory experiences that work best for you. This can require some experimentation. As you employ different senses, note how quickly your stress levels drop. And be as precise as possible. What is the specific kind of sound or type of movement that affects you the most? For example, if you’re a music lover, listen to many different artists and types of music until you find the song that instantly lifts and relaxes you.

Explore a variety of sensory experiences so that no matter where you are, you’ll always have a tool to relieve stress.

The examples listed below are intended to be a jumping-off point. Let your imagination run free and come up with additional things to try. When you find the right sensory technique, you’ll know it!

Sight

  • Look at a cherished photo or a favorite memento.
  • Use a plant or flowers to enliven your work space.
  • Enjoy the beauty of nature: a garden, the beach, a park, or your own backyard.
  • Surround yourself with colors that lift your spirits.
  • Close your eyes and picture a place that feels peaceful and rejuvenating.

Smell

  • Light a scented candle or burn some incense.
  • Experiment with different essential oils.
  • Smell the roses or another type of flower.
  • Enjoy clean, fresh air in the great outdoors.
  • Spritz on your favorite perfume or cologne.

Touch

  • Wrap yourself in a warm blanket.
  • Pet a dog or cat.
  • Hold a comforting object (a stuffed animal, a favorite memento).
  • Give yourself a hand or neck massage.
  • Wear clothing that feels soft against your skin.

Taste

Slowly savoring a favorite treat can be very relaxing, but mindless eating will only add to your stress and your waistline. The key is to indulge your sense of taste mindfully and in moderation.

  • Chew a piece of sugarless gum.
  • Indulge in a small piece of dark chocolate.
  • Sip a steaming cup of coffee or tea or a refreshing cold drink.
  • Eat a perfectly ripe piece of fruit.
  • Enjoy a healthy, crunchy snack (celery, carrots, or trail mix).

Movement

If you tend to shut down when you’re under stress or have experienced trauma, stress-relieving activities that get you moving may be particularly helpful.

  • Run in place or jump up and down.
  • Dance around.
  • Stretch or roll your head in circles.
  • Go for a short walk.
  • Squeeze a rubbery stress ball.

Sound

  • Sing or play a favorite tune.
  • Listen to calming or uplifting music.
  • Tune in to the soundtrack of nature—crashing waves, the wind rustling the trees, birds singing.
  • Buy a small fountain, so you can enjoy the soothing sound of running water in your home or office.
  • Hang wind chimes near an open window.

Vocal toning

As strange as it may sound, vocal toning is a special technique that reduces the stress hormones adrenaline and cortisol. Try sneaking off to a quiet place to spend a few minutes toning before a meeting with your boss and see how much more relaxed and focused you feel. It works by exercising the tiny muscles of the inner ear that help you detect the higher frequencies of human speech that impart emotion and tell you what someone is really trying to say. Not only will you feel more relaxed in that meeting, you’ll also be better able to understand what he’s trying to communicate.

How to tone: Sit up straight and simply make “mmmm” sounds with your lips together and teeth slightly apart. Experiment by changing the pitch and volume until you experience a pleasant vibration in your face and, eventually, your heart and stomach.

Tip 4: Find sensory inspiration

Having trouble identifying sensory techniques that work for you? Look for inspiration around you, from your sights as you go about your day to memories from your past.

Memories. Think back to what you did as a child to calm down. If you had a blanket or stuffed toy, you might benefit from tactile stimulation. Try tying a textured scarf around your neck before an appointment or keeping a piece of soft suede in your pocket.

Watch others. Observing how others deal with stress can give you valuable insight. Baseball players often pop gum before going up to bat. Singers often chat up the crowd before performing. Ask people you know how they stay focused under pressure.

Parents. Think back to what your parents did to blow off steam. Did your mother feel more relaxed after a long walk? Did your father work in the yard after a hard day?

The power of imagination. Once drawing upon your sensory toolbox becomes habit, try simply imagining vivid sensations when stress strikes. The memory of your baby’s face will have the same calming or energizing effects on your brain as seeing her photo. When you can recall a strong sensation, you’ll never be without a quick stress relief tool.

Take a break from technology

Taking a short hiatus from the television, computer, and cell phone will give you insight on what your senses respond to best.

  • Try tuning into relaxing music instead of talk radio during your commute. Or try riding in silence for 10 minutes.
  • Stuck in a long line at the grocery store? Instead of talking on your phone, take a moment to people watch. Pay attention to what you hear and see.
  • Instead of checking email while waiting for a meeting, take a few deep breaths, look out the window, or sip some tea.
  • While waiting for an appointment, resist the urge to text and give yourself a hand massage instead.

Tip 5: Make quick stress relief a habit

It’s not easy to remember to use your senses in the middle of a mini—or or not so mino—crisis. At first, it will feel easier to just give into pressure and tense up. But with time, calling upon your senses will become second nature. Think of the process like learning to drive or play golf. You don’t master the skill in one lesson; you have to practice until it becomes second nature. Eventually you’ll feel like you’re forgetting something if you don’t tune into your body during challenging times. Here’s how to make it habit:

Start small. Instead of testing your quick stress relief tools on a source of major stress, start with a predictable low-level source of stress, like cooking dinner at the end of a long day or sitting down to pay bills.

Identify and target. Think of just one low-level stressor that you know will occur several times a week, such as commuting. Vow to target that stressor with quick stress relief every time. After a few weeks, target a second stressor and so on.

Test-drive sensory input. If you are practicing quick stress relief on your commute to work, bring a scented handkerchief with you one day, try music another day, and try a movement the next day. Keep experimenting until you find a clear winner.

Have fun with the process. If something doesn’t work, don’t force it. Move on until you find what works best for you. It should be pleasurable and noticeably calming.

Talk about it. Telling friends or family members about the stress-relief strategies you’re trying out will help you integrate them into your life. As an added bonus, it’s bound to start an interesting conversation: everyone relates to the topic of stress.

Tip 6: Practice wherever you are

The best part of sensory-based strategies is the awareness that you have control. No matter where you are or what you’re doing, quick stress relief is within arm’s reach.

Quick stress relief at home

Entertaining. Prevent pre-party jitters by playing lively music. Light candles. The flicker and scent will stimulate your senses. Wear clothes that make you feel relaxed and confident.

Kitchen. Ease kitchen stress by breathing in the scent of every ingredient. Delight in the delicate texture of an eggshell. Appreciate the weight of an onion.

Children and relationships. Prevent losing your cool during a spousal spat by squeezing the tips of your thumb and forefinger together. When your toddler has a tantrum, rub lotion into your hands and breathe in the scent.

Sleep. Too stressed to snooze? Try using a white noise machine for background sound or a humidifier with a diffuser for a light scent in the air.

Creating a sanctuary. If clutter is upsetting, spend 10 minutes each day to tidy. Display photos and images that make you feel happy. Throw open the curtains and let in natural light.

Quick stress relief at work

Meetings. During stressful sessions, stay connected to your breath. Massage the tips of your fingers. Wiggle your toes. Sip coffee.

On the phone. Inhale something energizing, like lemon, ginger, peppermint. While talking, stand up or pace back and forth to burn off excess energy, or take calls outside when possible.

On the computer. Work standing up. Do knee-bends in 10-minute intervals. Suck on a peppermint. Sip tea.

Lunch breaks. Take a walk around the block or in the parking lot. Listen to soothing music while eating. Chat with a colleague.

Your workspace. Place family photos on your desk or mementos that remind you of your life outside the office.

Quick stress relief on the go

In traffic. Play music or listen to an audiobook. Take a different route to see something new. Do neck-rolls at stoplights. Sing in the car to stay awake and happy.

Public transportation. Take a break from reading, cell conversations, and music to tune into the sights and sounds around you. Try noticing something new, even if you’re on the same old bus ride.

Running errands. Wear a special perfume or lotion so you can enjoy it while you rush from place to place. Carry a stress ball in your pocket. Take a mental “snapshot” or “postcard” at each destination.

Waiting in lines. Instead of worrying about time slipping away, focus on your breathing. People watch. Chat with the person ahead of you. Chew a stick of minty gum.

Stress relief from laughter? It’s no joke

Stress relief from laughter? It’s no joke

Posted on by famouscapybara60

Whether you’re guffawing at a sitcom on TV or quietly giggling at a newspaper cartoon, laughing does you good. Laughter is a great form of stress relief, and that’s no joke. Keep scrolling to find the details about it at https://miramarretreat.org/

Stress relief from laughter? It's no joke

Stress relief from laughter

A good sense of humor can’t cure all ailments, but data is mounting about the positive things laughter can do.

Short-term benefits

A good laugh has great short-term effects. When you start to laugh, it doesn’t just lighten your load mentally, it actually induces physical changes in your body. Laughter can:

  • Stimulate many organs. Laughter enhances your intake of oxygen-rich air, stimulates your heart, lungs and muscles, and increases the endorphins that are released by your brain.
  • Activate and relieve your stress response. A rollicking laugh fires up and then cools down your stress response, and it can increase and then decrease your heart rate and blood pressure. The result? A good, relaxed feeling.
  • Soothe tension. Laughter can also stimulate circulation and aid muscle relaxation, both of which can help reduce some of the physical symptoms of stress.

Long-term effects

Laughter isn’t just a quick pick-me-up, though. It’s also good for you over the long term. Laughter may:

  • Improve your immune system. Negative thoughts manifest into chemical reactions that can affect your body by bringing more stress into your system and decreasing your immunity. By contrast, positive thoughts can actually release neuropeptides that help fight stress and potentially more-serious illnesses.
  • Relieve pain. Laughter may ease pain by causing the body to produce its own natural painkillers.
  • Increase personal satisfaction. Laughter can also make it easier to cope with difficult situations. It also helps you connect with other people.
  • Improve your mood. Many people experience depression, sometimes due to chronic illnesses. Laughter can help lessen your stress, depression and anxiety and may make you feel happier. It can also improve your self-esteem.
Improve your sense of humor

Are you afraid that you have an underdeveloped — or nonexistent — sense of humor? No problem. Humor can be learned. In fact, developing or refining your sense of humor may be easier than you think.

  • Put humor on your horizon. Find a few simple items, such as photos, greeting cards or comic strips, that make you chuckle. Then hang them up at home or in your office, or collect them in a file or notebook. Keep funny movies, TV shows, books, magazines or comedy videos on hand for when you need an added humor boost. Look online at joke websites or silly videos. Listen to humorous podcasts. Go to a comedy club.
  • Laugh and the world laughs with you. Find a way to laugh about your own situations and watch your stress begin to fade away. Even if it feels forced at first, practice laughing. It does your body good.
    Consider trying laughter yoga. In laughter yoga, people practice laughter as a group. Laughter is forced at first, but it can soon turn into spontaneous laughter.
  • Share a laugh. Make it a habit to spend time with friends who make you laugh. And then return the favor by sharing funny stories or jokes with those around you.
  • Knock, knock. Browse through your local bookstore or library’s selection of joke books and add a few jokes to your list that you can share with friends.
  • Know what isn’t funny. Don’t laugh at the expense of others. Some forms of humor aren’t appropriate. Use your best judgment to discern a good joke from a bad or hurtful one.

Laughter is the best medicine

Go ahead and give it a try. Turn the corners of your mouth up into a smile and then give a laugh, even if it feels a little forced. Once you’ve had your chuckle, take stock of how you’re feeling. Are your muscles a little less tense? Do you feel more relaxed or buoyant? That’s the natural wonder of laughing at work.

The Stoic: 9 Principles to Help You Keep Calm in Chaos

The Stoic: 9 Principles to Help You Keep Calm in Chaos

Posted on by famouscapybara60

Not only does philosophy teach us how to live well and become better humans, but it can also aid in overcoming life’s trials and tribulations. Some schools of thought are for more abstract thinking and debate, whereas others are tools that are immediately practical to our current endeavors.

The principles within Stoicism are, perhaps, the most relevant and practical sets of rules for entrepreneurs, writers, and artists of all kinds. The Stoics focus on two things:

  1. How can we lead a fulfilling, happy life?
  2. How can we become better human beings?

The goal of Stoicism is to attain inner peace by overcoming adversity, practicing self-control, being conscious of our impulses, realizing our ephemeral nature and the short time allotted—these were all meditative practices that helped them live with their nature and not against it. It’s important that we understand the obstacles that we face and not run from them; it’s vital that we learn to transmute them into fuel to feed our fire.

It’s important that we understand the obstacles that we face and not run from them.

Our guides to Stoicism today will be its three renowned leaders: Epictetus, Marcus Aurelius, and Seneca.

Epictetus was born a slave at about A.D. 55 in Hierapolis, Phrygia, located in the eastern borders of the Roman Empire. Early in his life he had a passion for philosophy, and with permission from his owner, he studied Stoic philosophy under the master Gaius Musonius Rufus. After Nero’s death—the fifth Roman emperor who ruled with tyranny and cruelty—Epictetus began to teach philosophy in Rome and then later in Greece where he founded a philosophical school teaching Stoicism—among his students was the future emperor of Rome, Marcus Aurelius.

Marcus Aurelius was born in A.D. 121, considered one of the greatest Roman emperors to have ever lived, and wrote in his journal during the dull moments of a war campaign. In his journal, which inadvertently became the book Meditations, served as reminders for Stoic principles that focused on humility, self-awareness, service, death, nature, and more.

Seneca was also a Roman Stoic philosopher, statesman, a tutor and advisor to Nero. His work involves dozens of essays and 124 letters that involve topics like education, friendship, civil duty, moral obligation, humility, self-awareness, self-denial, and more. He had many admirers like Montaigne, Tom Wolfe, Emerson, and John Stuart Mill.

The Stoic: 9 Principles to Help You Keep Calm in Chaos

I’m going to share some of my favorite principles from the Stoic school of philosophy, most of them pertaining to these three thinkers. If embraced and exercised regularly, Stoic tenets will champion your creativity, facilitate your workflow, and improve your overall state of mind and life. Creative work requires us to be vulnerable, committed, adaptive, and courageous, and that requires a mindset that can readily negate distractions or negative impulses while focusing our hearts and minds on what’s important. It’s a tough balancing act.

Without a philosophy to guide our work and life, we will relentlessly succumb to our excuses and distractions. We will make the comfortable mistake of acting on our moods (“I’m just not feeling it today”) and not on our principles.

1. Acknowledge that all emotions come from within

“Today I escaped anxiety. Or no, I discarded it, because it was within me, in my own perceptions — not outside.” — Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

It is not outside forces that make us feel something, it is what we tell ourselves that create our feelings. A blank document, canvas, or unmarked to-do list is not inherently stressful—it’s your thoughts that are stressing you out.

Many of us want to place blame and responsibility on external objects because it’s easy to do, but the truth remains that all conflicts start internally, in our minds. When we flee from reality—a deadline, an urgent email—we are doing nothing but harming ourselves and undermining our self-discipline.

The next time you run into an obstacle and feel resistance, don’t look at what’s around you. Instead, look within.

It is not outside forces that make us feel something, it is what we tell ourselves that create our feelings.

2. Find someone you respect, and use them to stay honest

“Choose someone whose way of life as well as words, and whose very face as mirroring the character that lies behind it, have won your approval. Be always pointing him out to yourself either as your guardian or as your model. This is a need, in my view, for someone as a standard against which our characters can measure themselves. Without a ruler to do it against you won’t make the crooked straight.” — Seneca, Letters From a Stoic

When I first started my blog and called myself a writer, who could I look up to? The courses at my university were irrelevant to my aspirations and desires. Luckily, the Internet provided access to great writers, their stories, work, and admonishments. I can point to someone I respect and say, “Ah, look at the value they provide, their work ethic, their platform—that is worth learning from.”

Whatever you do—create apps, draw portraits, write books, or make animation films—there are individuals that you can learn from. You can study their story, works, techniques, successes and failures. You can listen to interviews or even reach out to them by sending an email. You can discover patterns of success and apply it to your life.

What’s important to realize is that this isn’t an exercise of comparison. If you don’t get a book deal in eight months or if your product doesn’t hit #1 in the first week, like your role model, that doesn’t make you a failure. Instead, how can you learn from your heroes? How are their teachings and principles helping you grow, learn, and create? Everyone, no matter how successful they are, has heroes/mentors to look towards.

3. Recognize there is life after failure 

“Does what’s happened keep you from acting with justice, generosity, self-control, sanity, prudence, honesty, humility, straightforwardness, and all other qualities that allow a person’s nature to fulfill itself? So remember this principle when something threatens to cause you pain: the thing itself was no misfortune at all; to endure it and prevail is great good fortune.” — Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

You can spend months or even years on a project, only to watch it be criticized, or worse, ignored. I once worked on a project thinking that it would do fairly well. I spent an entire year on it, and it was my most vulnerable work to date.

The outcome was similar to having a baby and all the doctors laughing out loud, saying, “My goodness that is an ugly baby.”

That’s what failure feels like when you share a part of you. But recovering from that failure is a practice, a mindset—in fact, the lessons that I internalized from that experience is helping me do better work. The thinking goes: No failure, no growth.

No failure, no growth.

4. Read purposefully, and apply your knowledge

“Don’t just say you have read books. Show that through them you have learned to think better, to be a more discriminating and reflective person. Books are the training weights of the mind. They are very helpful, but it would be a bad mistake to suppose that one has made progress simply by having internalized their contents.” — Epictetus, The Art of Living 

Reading books on marketing or business or creativity will supply endless dots that have potential for connection to develop a more in-depth awareness, but what will ultimately make you effective at that craft is by applying it. Reading prepares your mind, even helps you avoid foolish mistakes, but at the end of it all there must be the result of some action: a failure, maybe a success, or a lesson.

The purpose of education is to internalize knowledge but ultimately spark action and facilitate wiser decisions. Reading self-help books will, in that moment, make you feel inspired for a change. But are you following your principles when you have a troll, rude customer, or angry stranger in your face?

5. Challenge yourself to be brutally honest

“‘A consciousness of wrongdoing is the first step to salvation.’ This remark of Epicurus’ is to me a very good one. For a person who is not aware that he is doing anything wrong has no desire to be put right. You have to catch yourself doing it before you can reform. Some people boast about their failings: can you imagine someone who counts his faults as merits ever giving thought to their cure? So—to the best of your ability—demonstrate your own guilt, conduct inquiries of your own into all the evidence against yourself. Play the first part of prosecutor, then of judge and finally of pleader in mitigation. Be harsh with yourself at times.” — Seneca, Letters From a Stoic

It’s hard to change habits if you aren’t aware as to why you didn’t do your work today and chose to watch Netflix instead.

It’s important to be mindful of the urges that obstruct us from showing up, engaging, committing, and being present. “Why, exactly, am I feeling this way?” Get to the bottom of that. Investigate it. Dissect it. When you feel resistance, use that as a cue to go forward. The challenge, of course, is training yourself to think that way.

This isn’t about talent or some unconscious reflex. The practice of self-awareness—to think about your thinking—in how you think, feel, and behave is a muscle. The more you use it, the stronger it becomes.

When you feel resistance, use that as a cue to go forward.

6. Reflect on what you spend the most time on 

“A key point to bear in mind: The value of attentiveness varies in proportion to its object. You’re better off not giving the small things more time than they deserve.” — Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

That troll on your Twitter feed? It’s probably best to not respond. You don’t need to tell them where the unfollow button is located; I’m positive they know. That email? I know it’s fun connecting, but can it wait?

In my own observations, people who do excellent work, who master their craft, do so because of their ability to prioritize. They honor every hour of their day. If we put cameras behind our heroes, would our work ethic compare? Our focus? Our determination to get things done?

The other day I was genuinely shocked at how much time I spent spectating on Instagram, watching other people live their lives and eat boats of sushi. Although these little breaks throughout our days are okay, we must be mindful of how we interact with our distractions (or is that addictions?).

A lot of spectating and flicking our finger on Guerrilla Glass is time that could be spent creating the stuff that people want to see.

7. Remind yourself: you weren’t meant to procrastinate.

Whenever I have trouble waking up or getting started, I read this passage:

“At dawn, when you have trouble getting out of bed, tell yourself: ‘I have to go to work—as a human being. What do I have to complain of, if I’m going to do what I was born for—the things I was brought into the world to do? Or is this what I was created for? To huddle under the blankets and stay warm?—But it’s nicer here…

So you were born to feel ‘nice’? Instead of doings things and experiencing them? Don’t you see the plants, the birds, the ants and spiders and bees going about their individual tasks, putting the world in order, as best they can? And you’re not willing to do your job as a human being? Why aren’t you running to do what your nature demands? 

—But we have to sleep sometime…

Agreed. But nature set a limit on that—as it did on eating and drinking. And you’re over the limit. You’ve had more than enough of that. But not of working. There you’re still below your quota. You don’t love yourself enough. Or you’d love your nature too, and what it demands of you. People who love what they do wear themselves down doing it, they even forget to wash or eat. Do you have less respect for your own nature than the engraver does for engraving, the dancer for dance, the miser for money or the social climber for status? When they’re really possessed by what they do, they’d rather stop eating and sleeping than give up practicing their arts.” — Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

8. Put the phone away and be present

“Nothing, to my way of thinking, is a better proof of a well ordered mind than a man’s ability to stop just where he is and pass some time in his own company.” — Seneca, Letters From a Stoic

It’s not that we live in an age of distractions, but rather an age where we are failing to teach and embrace mindful motives. To me, a child in a restaurant playing a game on her iPad is no different than an adult flicking through Instagram when friends are around. Both scenarios are moments of connection (to the people around you, not through your screen), communication, and enjoyment.

To be present as well as learning to be alone is a habit. Some people are really good at it because they make time to do it—in fact, they need it or else they would go mad.

Throughout your day find a moment, however fleeting, to just sit and be still. Doesn’t matter where you are. Take a few deep breathes, put your phone on vibrate so there’s no chance of interruption, and just reflect on the series of events that took place throughout your day. When you’re working, be ruthlessly present. Let your mind focus on the task at hand, what you’re trying to accomplish, and do it with diligence, patience, attentiveness, and care. Sooner or later, you’ll realize how much of an asset this is to your creativity and overall quality of life.

When you’re working, be ruthlessly present.

9. Remind yourself that time is our most precious resource

“Not to live as if you had endless years ahead of you. Death overshadows you. While you’re alive and able — be good.” — Marcus Aurelius, Meditations 

What I particularly love and find challenging about Stoicism is that death is at the forefront of their thoughts. They realized the ephemeral nature of humans and how this is repeated in many facets of life.

It provides a sense of urgency, to realize that you’ve lived a certain number of hours and the hours ahead of you are not guaranteed as the ones you have lived. When I think of this I realize that everyday truly is an opportunity to improve, not in a cliché kind of way, but to learn to honestly appreciate what we are capable of achieving and how we are very responsible for the quality of our lives.

This makes our self-respect, work ethic, generosity, self-awareness, attention, and growth evermore important. The last thing any of us wants to do is die with regret, hence why following principles of Stoicism puts your life into perspective. It humbles you and should also deeply motivate you.

Lastly, in the words of Seneca, “We should hunt out the helpful pieces of teaching and the spirited and noble-minded sayings which are capable of immediate practical application–not far far-fetched or archaic expressions or extravagant metaphors and figures of speech–and learn them so well that words become works.”

The way we lead our lives and do our work must embody the principles that we practice. Less comparing, criticizing, and consuming; more creating, learning, and living.